The 3 of us think it's time to start drinking.
3?
Me, myself and I
Full bush! Can't stay! Need ride! Come on bro!
He had a number 3 tattooed on his penis. And when I asked what it meant, he said " you know like dale earnhardt, the intimidator".
It's American, baby! There ain't nothin gross about America.
I love the "adulterer" look on you. It's hot.
Its part of my fall instant classic line.
I think even Ryan Seacrest is disgusted with the thought of Ryan Seacrest getting some.
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
Just peed on my foot. Thank you Sunday hangovers.
She thinks Jesus was an astronaut.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Please note that in response to your post about your dog's jaws clamped hard around a stick, I did not comment, "Takes after his dad." You're welcome.
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
My drunk ass is being chauffeured around like the damn queen of England
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
