Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
as he left, i held up my fist and said "pound it out" and he was like "are you serious, we just had sex..."
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Not exactly sure why you felt the need to get the halloween decorations out. But waking up to 7 carved pumpkins really scares the shit out of you.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I think ur a lot drunker then u think u are. That girl has the body of a cartoon character and not in a good way.
Dude if I call tonight please answer and just say "NO, dont do it."
BAT SHIT CRAZY
It's you're fault, even though I never called
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
I could see myself being this awkward weirdo drunk girl that patted strangers and danced terribly but was powerless to stop it
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
If you can't trust the person at the taco cabana drive thru, who can you trust?!
The guy whose house were at is drunkenly reading green eggs and ham to us in German
Randomize
