i dedicated my morning wood to you.
Exactly how low is masturbating to your cute professor's lecture videos?
so yeah i told her you were going to become a doctor and the first thing she said was "i still don't want to fuck him". i tried.
i googled waterboarding like you asked. as long as you do it outside. we have carpet. but i wont be a part of it.
Nothing like hearing a USA chant while getting head. God bless America.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
we were walking and you spelled the word "oats" to prove you weren't drunk.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
Every time I there's a break up, I'm left with an animal. That's it. No more mutual pets.
Day 10 and still no sign of rescue in my pants.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Randomize
