Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
Met the five year old's gym teacher for next year. He is an old drinking buddy and I used to fuck his older brother. It was like a walk of shame 20 years late.
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
he came on my stomach and it was 1000 degrees in his car. i smelled awesome.
I feel like I shouldn't be doing my banking stoned. But I bought a new bowl. Her name is Sharpe. Pronounced Shar-Pay.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
And I can feel feelings now and they hurt
sending him nudies in gran's hospital bathroom. you?
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
I bought something for you today. You'll love it.
What is it? Drugs?
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
I'm crying during the second episode of Golden Girls that's how high I am.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
Randomize
