I swear to god he was trying to crawl under my door last night muttering "I'm Alex Mac! I'm Alex Mac!"
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
He played a tape of his mad rapping skills after the final...his rapper name was Mad Stylz and he rapped about all the pussy he got in the 90's. I love Sociology.
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
Hurry up and get here I'm judging myself
He took the bartender's challenge and took a Jello shot with a tarantula frozen inside.
The three yr old girl I nanny grabbed a pole just now and is chanting "this is my house"
Sounds like you at that dive bar last weekend
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
Also, two points for knowing me well enough to know I definitely would put the moves on his brother.
I'm gonna write a book entitled "when you give a cop a cookie..."
I don't even want to know.
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
Randomize
