i have now learned nap means the same thing as sex in college
Even if he doesn't call, at least I can say i fucked a mascot.
so she bought me lunch gave me a blowie then paid for the gas since I drove... I think there's a catch but I'm gonna run with it
To justify your stumbling you just kept yelling 'it's the boat, not the drinks' We hadn't even left the dock yet....
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
Yeah I mean its Vermont, not like id be the first guy to trade pharmaceutical services for beer
eta to your mouth 5 minutes
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
I vaguely remember taking a yard light, holding it up like the statue of liberty, and all of us at the party chanting the national anthem. What a glorious night
My "lord keep me from stabbing a bitch" prayer has gotten a lot of miles today
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
Keep your fingers crossed. If I get to go to a Stanley Cup game I'll give you the blowjob he deserves for taking me. Because hes definitely not gettin it.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Randomize