He kept asking me to take off my bra and I sat up so he could. He fumbled with it for a few minutes and when I sighed and went to undo it he goes, "Yeah, you got this."
You tried to convince her that if she gave you head she'd hear the ocean.....
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
she was licking his armpits.
asian porn is just fucking weird. End of story.
on toilet. in drag. drinking coffee vodka. I regret nothing.
I only keep her as my best friend so she wont hook up with my ex.
Uhg.. This isn't fair. I just want to have sex with you until i lose consciousness, wake up and start over... is that so much to ask?
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Yeah but I was the kid who ran over your BMW and is banging your 15 year old daughter... There isn't a cool enough dad in the world to make that work.
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Well, it's a fine line between people-watching and boob-staring. It's a gray area. But we're in Paris. Let's leave it at that.
GETTING HORNY AT RANDOM IS REALLY FUCKING INCONSIDERATE.
If I get laid tonight it will 1.) Prove that the sex gods do in fact exist, and 2.) Show that I am one motherfucking badass bitch.
There is a special place in hell for people who only eat the center of the pot brownies.
my god I love twenty year old dicks
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