why are there post-it notes all around the apartment labeled where you guys had sex and in what position
we need a dd. For wednesday. At lunch. What are we doing with our lives?
succeeding
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
she shotgunned a can of v8, threw the can on the ground and said, "fuck bitches get money" then passed out on the spot
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
It's like some sort of initiation to finger one of them... so I did it. And got high fived afterwards like a dozen times.
Those were right hand only?
Dude. Where are you? I'm making waffles in the waffle iron. It's beautiful.
Dumb decision of the night...walking home drunk and smelling my pepper spray
Hurry up I'm getting mooned by a hobo
Twist bend and done? Jesus that sounds like a seventh grade hand job.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
Randomize
