How crunk are you?
I'm a Tom Selleck. Zero being Tipper Gore and max being the Bush twins
Just woke up in bed, AC on high, with a fresh pack of smokes, an unopened pint of vodka, and a bag w a beef patty w cheese in it. I think my roommate's like the toothfairy or something. Or that was way more Xanax than I needed.
A relator touring our house this week saw the picture in our bathroom of steven passed out, yellow faced, with BALLS on his forehead, and had to ask "if that kid was alive or dead".
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
Dude i think i got lasagna in my eye
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
Just induced vomiting to put out a carpet fire.
Everyone is cheering
I'm sitting in front of a fan naked drinking Gatorade. Motherfucking hangover probs
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
he was like "can i get a kiss" and i was like "can i get a taco"
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
That's one good thing about being an only child. I can masturbate wherever the fuck I want
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
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