is it wrong to smoke out middle schoolers?
yes...dear jesus what did you do?
bwahaha. ask your little brother in about 20 minutes. im dropping him off.
At my wifes high school reunion. Found out her nickname was 'Back Door Brooke'. EVERYONE is calling her that.
Drinking down Plan B with a 5 hour energy. Winding down welcome week in style.
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
So his mom walked in the kitchen while I was sucking him off and just casually suggested that "I'd need a glass of water after that"
I don't know what I would do if cheese never existed
Someone's stooooned
Yeah. Well last night I sold my shoes to a man who I'm pretty sure has a weird foot fetish for $150 cash.
Let's get drunk and put things on the grill that have no right to be there.
Happy birthday, America.
I made out with my former step mother's best friend. Only knew the connection when they both showed up together at the bar.
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
It's like the dark age of my sex life being stuck here
I can't. I mean he's hot, but there's really nothing else there
You just said he's hot
NO YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND
Would you paint my ceiling for oral sex?
Do you know how difficult it is to snap a good dick pic while driving?
Randomize
