the family i'm sitting with looks like the Addams family. Except for the daughter...she looks like Shrek
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
She was ugly to the point i wanted to brush my teeth after looking at her
She solidified the fact that the icon from Wendy's is the only ginger I care for
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I mean can we take a second to high five on our sex life? I love us.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Bloody Mary Monday just took a turn for the worst... Just had a heart to heart talk with the cat about it's obsession with chewing on cardboard.... Time for a nap.
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
Yoga may not b such a good idea for me today. My liver is obviously in cahoots with my colon to pay me back for the past 24 days of misuse . Downward dog could have catastrophic consequences.
I'm so baked, I spent the last hour trying to screencapture the cracks on my phone.
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
Please tell me you did not shit your Disney princess costume.
Makes hanging out interesting when she lights you on fire just to roll ontop of you to 'put you out'.
Omfg I just White Claw shamed a Girl Scout Cookie mom and I feel SO BAD.
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