hey this is lauren, i have to type for jon because he's convinced the tongs he's holding are his real hands
I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
How did you even find out?
Because you came up to me and said "I just fucked in the bathroom."
Oh.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
Eating an ice cream sandwich while your little bro gets me weed. May I adopt him?
There was a pumpkin carving contest and we carved a very realistic dick about to penetrate a vagina. Our Christian Youth hosts were not happy.
The topic of sex in the jamba banana suit has come up on multiple occasions. We're just waiting for a moment to try it out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think there are two dudes living in an apartment somewhere that go to the store and call it Brocery shopping?
Oh god...probably.
wtf I can't believe that bar tender told on me to my mom
lol hangovers are for mortals.
I'm sexting at my family's 4th of July BBQ and I feel no shame....
i'll explain later but cookie monster is playing the xylophone
He looks like Aladdin, and that's about all he's got going for him.
Randomize