Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
I found out you can't leave the bar with a drink. I also found out that pouring it on the bouncers shoes is also unacceptable.
You just kept yelling, "THAT'S THE POWER OF PINESOL, BABY!"
she crawled under her car and passed out. Unfortunately her feet were sticking out and someone called 911 because they thought she had been run over.
Why am I wearing a dog collar
Only way we could keep you from running in to traffic.
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Dude, I'm trippin balls. For real, I thought this bag on my floor was my dog for the longest time...
It's like she fell out of an MTV reality show and no one knows how to send her back
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
This was the fourth year in a row I got arrested at Pride. Pretty sure that qualifies me as a legend.
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
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