never play flip cup with pint glasses
If burritos were dicks, we'd have a serious relationship problem on our hands. Just saying.
He's like the fucking Houdini of bras. Not only did I not feel him take it off I didn't find it until two days later.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
I returned the dress. When they asked for the reason for return I said, 'I don't deserve to wear white'.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
I come back into the room and you're grinding with the person in the mascot suit.
she said i was like a little lamb and she felt bad for luring me into her den of sin. then she blew me.
Being a virgin isn't supposed to be this easy for you.
If for no other reason than to cuddle with that puppy, you have to hook up with him again.
Well at least the house will be decorated when u get evicted.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Had a slight melanoma scare this morning. Spoiler alert, it was Nutella.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
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