You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
dude beer before liquor = i want to shoot myself in the face
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I feel that the whole multiple orgasm thing is god's way of saying "sorry for the childbirth deal"
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
the igloo is complete. bring your weed and the hat with the floppy ears
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
If I win the contest of drinking the most water I get a chicken nugget.
i've created a new STD.
Self reach around competition is what the Olympics has been missing all along. A true test of athleticism.
I feel like my liver should be on crutches right now
OMFG. JUST WALKED IN ON A DUDE JERKING IT IN THE MCDONALDS BATHROOM
Stall or urinal?
My vibrator turned on under my pillow when I was taking a nap this morning... I nearly shit my pants.
Randomize
