Just got yelled at by a priest...again.
I want to walk on stilts...naked
i'm in his bathroom *freshening up* and he not only has a hairdryer... but a straightener. get me out of here... NOW
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
If You’re Hot, It’s Easier For You To Do These 27 Things
Everytime I walk into a bathroom at school that I've taken a pregnancy test in I get a little bit nostalgic....
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
Worst case scenario: I have VD and will die. That's the worst that could happen. As long as I'm around long enough to see the winner of bachelor pad, I'm cool
I gave him head in my cape. On the kitchen floor. Watching a show about bacon.
i've been hiding in the laundry chute for like thirty minutes from her. not my manliest moment. but dude this is awesome
23 Struggles Kids These Days Will Never Know
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
I say I hate my boss but I find myself jerking off to him more and more with each passing day
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.