Every time there's an awkward silence a gay baby is born
my grandma just put on bowling shoes, to play wii bowling.
And it just wouldn't be a Thursday night without me having to cuss out a foreigner. The streak continues.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Either I need to stop bringing you back to my apt or I need to stop buying ikea furniture
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
can you just act like it's not so easy to get a blowjob from me??
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I look like one classy bitch running in heels through my backyard while carrying a small dog and a large bottle of booze. How am I still single?
Seems like you've kicked summer 2012 off well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Omg he has a washer and dryer IN his apartment and lots of back up toilet paper. I went home with an adult. My uterus is pumping out eggs beyond my control.
I'm remembering the time we thought it was a brilliant idea to put koolaid powder in shots of goldschlager
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
My talents include parallel parking and over reacting about absolutely everything.. And drinking..
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
So you realized he wasn't actually cheating on you and now you're trying to unfuck things. Or in this case unfuck Tom.
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