it took me about 5 minutes before I knew it was in her ass. i thought the first time would be a bit more special
So many tools at one table, you'd enjoy my italian family
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
I'm allowed to be upset. I've never had that many fingers in my ass
I was mixing candy canes and coors light and was in a great place.
We found you in the middle of the road chucking gravel because "the house was too far away".
i know i shouldn't tell you this since i want you to really like me but i just spent the last 4 hours sleeping on the toilet.
Dude it's huge. I don't usually like looking at those things, but you're kind of forced to stare that horse in the face.
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
Such a shame we didn't work out. We would've been a power couple producing NFL linemen :/
Walk of shame through Chipotle? Check.
If he doesn’t slap your ass with his drumsticks, then I don’t wanna hear about it.
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