Nice. Sry i missed. Also sorry that i pissed on my toothbrush last nite
Sink seemed easy target but balance was no good
so then we both started to do the walk of shame and she didnt realize we had fucked in her apartment until some lady said hi to her in the elevator
you didnt stop her?
too entertaining
i wish sherlock holmes were still around today... he'd be able to find my g-spot.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So.. My internet got red-flagged at work because i did a search on "midigit strippers las vegas" This may be hard to explain...
He choked me out. i woke up to poo. I dont think i like S&M
Even though I wasn't drunk last night, I peed in the sink just so I could keep my record going
Max was wondering if he could trade you sex for the use of your jumper cables
He taped the number 420 over all of his clocks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He graduated with honors. I've seen him kneeboard on dry ground and run a razor scooter into a wall...anyone can graduate with honors
We were sitting in my backseat and he just kept biting me and telling me we weren't at the zoo...
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
How many weight watcher activity points do you think sex is worth?
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