Why the hell does jager make you get to the point of having to army crawl around cause you cant feel your legs and scream jaga bombs when puking??
look out your window.... he's holding his iphone up like a boombox playing you beach boys
There are 9 condoms on my bed either i met the greatest girl ever last night or something horrible has happened.
and he's drinking a bud lime in his profile pic meaning i can out drink him, meaning i would clearly be the alpha in our relationship
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Or stump rather since he's possibly large. Large penises don't have tips, just blunt ends of battering rams.
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I swear to god little potato creatures live inside Belvedere bottles and claw at your throat as you swallow shots.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
To shove my foot up anybody ass who tries to start shit. I'm not takin shit this year. That and I wanna volunteer somewhere to help make a difference
I've pulled 4 ticks off of me. This is the last time I suck dick in the wild.
Your penis caused this!
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
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