hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
2 things. 1. I just gave her a 6 hour long marathon fucking for America. 2. Thought of a new invention halfway through, and it's flawless.
We're discussing which museums we should go to when we shroom. How ill would Picasso be?
All inclusive resorts are actually just places that livers go to die.
that bad?
u-n-l-i-m-i-t-e-d. f-r-e-e. t-e-q-u-i-l-a.
Sober now. I'm really glad I didn't try to make out with that guy who has a pregnant fiance
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Jake and I will do a protection ritual for ur dick I don't know where she has been
I have a high opinion of you, you smash bitches. Respect.
I just meant the frequency of your blow jobs on a flow chart wouldn't look too promising
Just got tinder matched with my COMM TA. Game on.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
Listening to sad Lana Del Rey songs together is an integral part of the lesbian bonding process
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
Is she blowing you? I'm in the closet.
About that photo of the cake you just sent. You do realize it’s on a glass table, right? We can all see your reflection in it, and you’re very obviously naked.
Randomize
