Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
i'm sure there's a big cosmic reason for things working out the way they did. like, now you have awesome images to masturbate to.
you're dressed like that and you're on the rag, that's false advertisment
I gave them both handjobs at the same time. Felt like I was skiing
We'll cross that bridge when we come to it... Or burn it. Either way we'll deal with it later
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
Bring your friend that fell asleep in the bathroom for my friend.
You realize we were screaming in the car about our apartment next year because we can "bring home randoms whenever we want" and "stare at each other from our door ways"
They had to stop us from skinny dipping in the reflection pool of the Mormon temple.
WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU
MANY MANY THINGS AND MOST OF THEM ARE YOUR FUCKING FAULT
I was totally going to fuck him and then his friend walked in brushing his teeth, whipped down his pants and started doing the windmill. Ultimate cock block
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
Randomize
