Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
you made wolf sounds and yelled "team me" the entire movie
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
The best part about passing out on the floor was the fact that when I pissed myself, I didn't piss the bed again.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
I don't remember what you were saying to me in the bathroom. But whatever it was, yes, because i remember nodding a lot.
There something about a girl that pirates lemonade off a restaurant fountain as a mixer that I find intriguing.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
Dude I swear I'm scooping human shit out of the litter boxes. What the fuck happened last night?
I'm dangerously close to tossing this whole "morals" bullshit and swan-diving into the fuckboy lifestyle.
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
Randomize
