I fucked a guy named chris tucker last night
In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
i just won an entire level on word mole with the word 'clitoris'
It's a shame that I don't know his last name. Actually, it's an ever bigger shame that I don't know his first name
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
when she started singing "you look better when im drunk" to my cat i realized it was time to take her home
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
Do you relize what downtown will be like this week? Like open season. But instead of deer its hot baseball players from all over the country that we'll never have to see again. I swear the college world series is a gift from god.
When I'm famous, she'll look at her kids and go "I saw her buttcheeks beefore she was famous. I'm truly blessed."
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
I don't like how my gyno is telling me how to live my life.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
I'm going to make you a sign to put on your penis to ward others off
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
