Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
i need a penis for penetration, you wont do.
oh yeah... my b.
My lunch today consisted of going on the brewery tour with my boss. Free pretzels and two free beers.
I hate you.
To be fair, the beers are only 8 ounces each. So maybe you just kinda dislike me.
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
He told me he wouldn't do any drunk sluts but me. I guess that's sort of a compliment...?
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
we started pounding beers an hour ago to celebrate our personal snow day tomorrow. vodka shots for u of i's actual decision are on standby.
It's just my hair. It brings natural happiness. Like goldfish, big boobs, and milkshakes.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
We bird danced in front of the bird cages for 20 minutes. I think it was our way of being like fuck you guys you're in a cage and we're on summer break.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
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