how the fuck does easy mac keep making itself at 3am when i'm wasted? what is this phenomenon?
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
is it still called a breakup if its your friends boyfriend that you have stopped sleeping with?
just threw up on my speech test, so much for a great semester
the fact that he forgave me for making out with the bartender is proof that i can fuck my way out of anything.
There was a lot going on. It was easy to miss a 70 foot tall puppet.
I just saw the Mona Lisa in the background of a porno. Whole new appreciation for art. fuck you I'm cultured.
We had three bowls going. It was a tri-bowl tournament. Harry potter shit.
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
Still not sure if my open-bar-week-long-trip to Cuba is the best idea as a congratulations-for-my-sober-february-challenge. My liver might just explode and give up.
And I was like "take off the damn flower crown, we're about to have sex not post an indie picture on tumblr"
why not an indie porn pic then
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Guess who just stumbled into work hungover, wearing yesterday's clothes, covered in hickeys and glitter, and carrying a giant bottle of rum in her purse.
I just took plan B at work.
This is the greatest story of all time.
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