apparently red wine has the total opposite effect that whiskey does on his dick
I got oddly confused when she started talking in third person in bed.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
they were just spraying pledge on themselves and calling it lemon cologne.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
dude she looked like Newman from Seinfeld I'm done with this wingman shit
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
You kept yelling "wood grain wheel" and grinding on fat chicks.
The hell is wrong with me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
Dedication to a hook up: I had to recruit five people at the train station to help me buy a ticket from a kiosk and get on the right train in 15 minutes because I discovered that my car was stolen.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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