fix you gags fore go to garrits please? !!!!!!!
What does that mean?
How when the cu k dos I yet u
Focus
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
why did they invent bidet's? your butt gets clean when your poop falls in the toilet and splashes up anyway...
She was wasted. Kept yelling "what if I'm pregnant" and trying to push me into the tree. First and last time I bring a girl to my family christmas party.
Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment
You may have cured my horniness. I feel like my libido just got shat on by kittens who live on an enchanted rainbow.
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
HE STARTED HUMMING THE THEME TO STAR WARS!! WHILE I'M SUCKING HIS DICK!!
I made a separate snapchat account so I could swap nudes with a guy from omegle.
Why do all of your bad decisions sound like fucked up mad libs?
i just has to use a gift card to Target that one of my students parents got me to buy Plan B bc my bank account is -$0.08 so my 2017 is starting exactly how i pictured.
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
I experienced pure joy just moments ago when I looked down and saw that I had another pop tart to consume down my mouth hole.
my roomie eats chipotle far too often. when i was looking for a bag to throw up in I had my choice of a wlamart bag and 10 chipotle bags
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
