Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
i lost my life and panties somewhere between the 15th and 16th round of slap the bag.
I cannot remember December 31 for the past 3 years. it might as well not even exist on my calendar anymore
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear, he has the body awareness of an acid-tripping quadriplegic.
Your couch is like an animal shelter for stray drunks.
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
You aren't going to like my movie choice because it's a Disney movie, but I am cordially inviting you to the couch for blowjobs.
It's like... Even my horoscope knows I had an awkward threesome last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I am the girl who goes to bed with her make-up on so that she doesn't have to fully redo it in the morning. I am obviously not ready to be a mother.
How does that even work?
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
When he couldn't get it up, he handed me a beer, put his clothes back on, and said "try again tomorrow."
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
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