Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
he called to tell me the scratches were still on his back. this was in the summer.. still the best hookup
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
so how was last night?
got high and had our usual talk about the definition of cole slaw. then tried to call the ramen noodle company and convince them why my face should be on thier packages.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I just told a squirrel he was gonna suffocate because he was eating a plastic bag. and i stared at him till he spit it out. Its official, I love squirrels more than people. they actually listen.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
I think he should just go away to a small penis island and never come back
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
Rule number 1 of dorm living: do not forget your butt plug in the bathroom.
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