i think my tv is drunk
cab driver gave us mini bottles of jd for the ride home & proceeded to run every red light. wonder how many bottles he drank.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
We have nothing in common but the sex rocks, would it be awful to develop a drug habit just to have a topic of conversation?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
we're havin a 400 loko party for joe pa's 400th win. come get loko
just watched the video of me leading you with a trail of french fries.
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CSI Miami is on and the guy is trying to save this woman who got shot. By stripping off his shirt & belt. THE WOMAN NEEDS YOUR PANTS OFF TOO
I woke up with $140 in twenties in my bra and have never been more puzzled.
Also I've been at work for an hour and I've already been "honey"d "babe"d and "beautiful"d by three separate men. Apparently hungover with yesterdays make up looks good on me.
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Shhhh less advice, more soothing words and dirty phrases
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
Randomize