yeah, but that could mean anything in Denmark.
my mom just asked me what a queef is. she needs to stop watching south park
My mom said "I don't want to fund your drug problem" so she gave me a gift card to the book store. I now have a 420 page book on growing weed.
Worst night here by far. And ive slipped in my own piss so thats saying something
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I just met his other fuck buddy...I am thinking of befriending her just to fuck with him...manuplating my roommates into hating each other is boring me i need something else to do
there is nothing ok with the fact that that was the 4th time i peed in the same parking ramp
Did you catch one of my beer pong balls in your cleavage or was that a dream?
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
We'll get you some ice cream, but no sprinkles. Sprinkles are for winners.
Since I won't be making love with anyone on a bed of roses this year on Sunday I bought a Mustang to fill the gap
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
So the next time I search for "Dragon Dildo" on my phone, I should probably clear the browser before handing my phone to someone and that's the first thing they see haha
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
also, i'm not sure if i'm proud to say this but our regional manager's hot fiance was grinding on me at the reception while he stood and watched.
i suppose that explains why he told me he plans on promoting you this Friday.
Randomize
