as for my dating sex life, no more regret sticks. Only pride wands from now on.
Just tell him to eat fruit before so it tastes good. Then it's just like shotgunning a smoothie
I think a 5 ft pyramid of jello shots in honor of the egyptians is in order
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
All of a sudden i love everyone. In all their flawed and failing beauty. This is pretty good weed.
We told her to calm down. She said "I'm Buddha!". Then army crawled to the cooler for more vodka.
I was talking about you wanting my dick, but that works too
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
Well she made a 15 year old cry, the grandmother did an ice luge and I woke up to the sound of sex moans
Yeah! Just remind me to. I'll also bring the blow up penis
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
We always have to do something together that tests the human limits of the body. Hopefully it has at least a 75% death rate.
Oh god he’s a clown I fucked a rodeo clown
Was just at a stoplight and some kid was smoking a blunt and we smiled at him and he offered to pass it between cars... Only in Rockford
Randomize
