why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
Someone will be leaving this trip either pregnant or devastated.
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
How was your weekend?
The sex was so good. It hurts to exist.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
I want to be your penis for a week.
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
That sounds promising. I'm twerking to human nature.
It is a fiery spray of napalm-covered beautiful words that leave a flaming "fuck you" on the ground after I destroy him.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
How hard do you think it would be to make a drinking game out of a Slip-N-Slide? Asking for a friend.
THERE IS A BABY THAT ISN'T MINE THAT'S GOING TO HEAR ME BEING SEXED!
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Randomize
