I cut you off after you tried to do a shot out of a neti pot, down your nose.
explains the nose bleeds.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
They usually take it with their boobs. It's like a horizontal motorboat
He's sitting in his room on Facebook with nothing but a pillow covering his crotch. I can't help you at the moment.
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Wait also totally unrelated but can horses sit down?
I just tried to picture one and I don't think they can cause I can't envision it
There are Vine videos that have lasted longer than he did
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
Starting this Monday as I always do
With a desperate plea for help
He made her leave because she liked Top-Ramen better than Maruchaun. He's my hero.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
I fell out of my bed whilst trying not to move this morning. I AM ADULT
I had ice cream for breakfast two days in a row.
SUPER ADULTS
You got up in the middle of a sentence, puked, came out and poured another glass of wine and continued your story.
Randomize
