But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
I guess she didn't feel like it. There was hair all over it and everything
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just so you know, I have a bf.
I guess as long as you bring single girls over and cook cannolis you will still be useful.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
making an appointment with student health services to check out my pinkeye on 4/20. they are going to thing this is such a joke
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
THERE ARE SO MANY ALCOHOLS IN MY BLOOD RIGHT NOW
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You just said the word 'slut' out loud in your sleep and then made a moaning noise
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
These morning walks of shame have became my morning jogs
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize