I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
I just single handedly caused ferngully by printing the wrong 900 page document
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
For someone who "only drinks patron" your lack of pickiness with men alarms me
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
I'm eating cereal out of the pocket of my flannel right now
Well. Turns up no one actually knows who that kid was. Came in, said happy fathers day, chilled for a while, then left.
Breaking a step ladder over someone's back turned into a really fun game, way too quickly.
40s are totally the cure
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I ACCIDENTALLY SUPER LIKED HIM. I JUST DELETED TINDER FROM MY PHONE.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
