Did you REALLY have to twitter about our sex last night?
I can't remember last night. I must have yelled at your girlfriend til she cried again.
Yup.
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
Chick took off her bra in the middle of class cuz it was "too hot." How's going out of state feel now?
i'm satisfied with the level of pretty that his new girlfriend isn't.
They nicknamed me the gargoyle. Sex with me is getting gargoyled. The last one I fucked yelled "gargoyle me" for dirty talk. I think fucking me is part of their pledging initiation. Somewhat OK with this.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I did the walk of shame wearing his scrubs. Fucking med school students is the way to go.
Ok. I am hammered I will admit it but my legacy needs to live and your the only woman that could spawn satan. We need to talk.
No he exists. Who else tells me no matter how drunk I am to pull out. He's watching over me so my bastard doesn't get created.
You should have hard cock pics on hand to send in the situation that you can't stop driving, pull out your cock, browse the countless pics I've sent you of my tits, get him hard and text a pic through. I mean, it's simple sexting ettiquette.
Oh, and also, a couple of straight girls showed up. But they ran away.
he ate me out like 4 times and told me that my vagina "was too much fun".
Woke up in a sombrero and a males speedo. Tequila makes normal peoples clothes fall off, however it makes me fall into a questionable identity crisis
When your hungover saltines taste like hope...
Randomize