Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
I believe that I finger-banged my way to the top of the corporate ladder.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
margarita scented body wash shouldn't be used the morning after cuervo. there should be a warning on the label.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
He tried to eat me out in the bath... I said it was a bad idea, but he said it was good snorkelling practice for vaca.
That little tingle vodka gives me in my esphagus is what lets me know I'm still alive.
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Dude, you left ME alone in your house. With your fully-stocked wine cellar. Why would you do that to yourself?
That was obviously his first time talking dirty. He called my vagina "pretty"
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
This is the difference between me and him; he buys you flowers, I buy you a dildo
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
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