I just saw a hobo shake a payphone until it spat out a bunch of quarters. what a champ.
Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
No she wasnt mad! I told her that I "mis-remembered" nailing her friend.
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
No. untill you have done a puke that contains nothing but semen and tequila, you do not 'feel my pain'
Using what I learned in my global terrorism class last semester to sneak booze onto my cruise. thanks college.
Please tell me your aunt didn't see the Brita pitcher full of condom wrappers. We had at least 100.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
There's a lady here with a big bag of dildos. I'm not sure that's appropriate bar baggage but, I like her style
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
I climaxed at the same time the bass dropped. I think it's safe to say I've reached enlightenment
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
My fire has petered out without you
My Peter has fired out without you
That might be the most romantic thing you’ve said to me, unfortunately.
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