unlike you, ive never imagined darth vader masturbating
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
i cant talk right now. we are trying to finish our homework so we can play with play-doh
in case you havent found it already in honor of Toy story 3 we wrote ANDY on the bottom of your foot while you were passed out on the couch.
i pretended i was deaf and got a girl to come home with me
mary just dropped the yahtzee dice in her wine. and shes throwin em like shes on a craps table.
hahahaha slap the bag.
Okay now that I've been wanting to eat these hot cheetos in the bathroom, I know it's time I need to stop smoking and go to sleep.
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
Despite popular belief cocaine is not a good pre-workout
I'd just like to formally thank you for the size of your dick. The gods must really love you.
I feel like I have a very capable uterus.
Things he's good at: oral sex and geometry. Things he's not good at: actual sex.
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Step 1 was make out with him. so now we just need to come up with step 2.
also. when i get a car, the amount of space there is for sex WILL be a huge deciding factor.
Randomize
