ARI BLEW A 2.0 HAHAHAHAHAHHAHH THESE COPS ARE SO COOL!!!!
If facebook stalking was a job I would totally pown it
Who wears a wallet chain?!
CAN CRIS ANGEL JUST LOOK NORMAL FOR ONCE?!
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I saw you sitting on top of my car trying to row back home... Did you make it?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
It's important to establish I slept with her BEFORE we officially became cousins-in-law.
The morning after your company Xmas party and that moment you're eating a block of cheese in bed wearing a sequin blazer and recalling all the details of your one night stand with a coworker who happened to start that day...fuck.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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