what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
If I die tonight, wear a V neck to my funeral.
I should take him calling me "a freak of nature" after sex as a compliment, right??
I learned an important lesson this weekend.... I'm way to good at sex to travel for it. From now on he drives here...
His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.
To sum up. The glass blower from the ren faire ate me out last night. Best ever. Go find yourself an artisan.
i knew as soon as i met you that i was gonna be the designated driver
I just swallowed some ecstasy stuck in my nose from last night. Work should be interesting.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
I woke to him laying in the floor puking in a shoe. So I guess we had a good night.
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
I swear if you get so drunk that I have to sing Bohemian Rhapsody to you again to get you to come out of the bathroom I'm leaving you at the bar this time.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
Like how do you live your life and have never made a grilled cheese? The audacity of some people
Randomize
