I DID IT WITH MY SOCKS ON!
Get out...Run...Or there's going to be a dick in your mailbox
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
She only remembers me when she's drunk. It's like I'm a suppressed memory that only surfaces with alcohol.
Cause your way of greeting people at the club was grabbing a tit and jiggling it while yelling a name, which usually wasn't theirs, and guys weren't safe either.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
Call me as soon as you're able to dial a phone. I just took a shit behind a building in broad daylight and need to get the fuck outta here soon.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dad got stoned the other day and bought us potty training seats for when we have children
i always handshake my one night stand, im classy like that.
Do you want to talk about dinosaurs?
It's hard to talk dirty with a mouth full of peanut butter
as a side note pls kill me
He's a downgrade and it was quick. But it was dick nonetheless.
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