All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
this is no time to have dignity 4/20 is coming
Jus posted an album so big that it takes my manhood into question
Just tried to use the bottle of Sprite in my car as mouthwash to get the taste of puke out of my mouth- it's half vodka. Puked again. Thanks man.
I wish we could tell the moving van to wait at the strip club for a while.
You need to stop blackout tweeting at him to have sex with you on the roof of your dorm. He doesn't even have a twitter.
Just found the cutest bag of coke under my bed. I'm going to get fucked up and bleach the cat vomit out of my sheets.
Also I legit had a girl at my bar crying tonight saying to her friend "why did he have to take his top off ?"
Judging by the fact that he asked me if i wanted to serenade him using cocaine and Taylor Swift I'd say I so have it in the bag.
I just watched a guy smoke weed through a French Horn. He is my hero
In the liquor store when a straight girl and a gay guy were just arguing about who hooked up with the same guy first.
You sealing the pinky promise with a shot was much better than just kissing it
Where are you guys?
Drunk
Gotta go, there’s a chick at my door that wants to give me head
Just found out a shooting happened in our parking lot while it was closed this morning. So thaaaaaaaaats fun.
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