she didnt even puke last nite, shes finally hit champion status. i think im in love
Definitely just saw the guy I went on a date with Friday night dressed in medeival knight gear on the quad preparing for battle. Oh my God.
She just asked me if I was going to kiss her cat goodby too... This is why we don't stay till last call.
We hadn't had sex in so long that I started queefing and then I couldn't stop giggling... I think he's mad.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
i would really love it if at least once per weekend i did not wake up to you half naked passed out on the floor
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
I wish so many great beards were not attached to even greater jerks. All that face sitting potential wasted. Some of the greatest tragedies of this century.
Being home for break is weird, just had a full convo with my dad about what I wanted for dinner, while a dildo was on top of me under my comforter
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Randomize
