six shots in, he is hammered and doing stretches before each shot
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
I just sniffled when I woke up and got a bump of coke. I have never felt so good hung over.
Drunk me was responsible for doing it, but sober me was definitely cheering him on
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
Just because im a good person doesn't mean that I don't reserve the right to be a complete dick about it.
I may be in the process of acquiring a second male fuck buddy and dating a girl....FUCKING STOP THE TRAIN I'M ON! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!!
A guy in a banana suit just got the whole bus to participate in a call and response version of Bohemian Rhapsody. HERO
I just came inside of a Gatorade bottle. That hungover.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
It's always appealing to be able to say to someone "I banged your mom"
I'm SO high. And there is so much pudding in this car
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
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