i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
I remember spending $50 at Ozzie's on Friday...my Visa remembers $120.
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
I don't know what it is about vodka that make me ruin relationships.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
woke up to find i out made out with his roommate before hooking up with him. breakfast was awkward to say the least
When you're done railing that chick, there is still half a pizza and some ninja turtle mac and cheese down here if you want
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
Just a little. Like do I say "hey I'm the girl that's fucking your son, nice to meet you"
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
Randomize
