Saw a Delta Zeta recruitment poster today. On it, somebody added, "All you need is your daddy's credit card and a lack of self-respect."
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
well hello there hangover. fancy meeting you here on this BRIGHT thursday morning.
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
i'm pretty sure i saw my life flash before my eyes when we ran a red light. i continued to drink and be the drunk backseat driver.
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You know my ex in high school who cheated on me and dumped me right before prom? A decade later, I just saw her again...working at an Arby's. it was a good day...
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
He walked straight into the wall, said "excuse me ma'am" and continued back to his dorm room.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
I wouldn't call that a crush. It was more of a minor brain aneurism.
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You sent 2 glasses of water to the table next us and told to the waitress they were on you. I repeat: water
She told me she loves wine, but hates the mud butt the next day. Dude, way to much info on a second date.
Do me a favor and scream dirty things at him in a polite sexy, come hither way
Randomize
