He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
i promise ill be ok...btw im only considered "not ok" if i end up in the hospital.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
Talked to Nate, told him he was a douche. Will give details when sober. It's ok. You're my best friend together a wolf pack. Olive juice.
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
OH MY GOD THE LITTLE GIRL IS SITTING WITH US WHILE WE SMOKE. I'M NOT DOING THIS
His balls are like really small, like dog sized balls. It was a weird discovery. Ever done a guy with dog sized balls?
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
I came home wearing somebody's thong. If you're missing one message me privately.
i woke up with fake boobs glued on my chest and a large black dildo on my hand. then i had to dress myself and walk home. people saw.
I told my coworker that I'm going to a dinner party and was asked to bring wine and pregnancy tests and he was like.. I miss being 20
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Whiskey. Because sometimes it's fun to have your hands go numb.
After everything I’ve done… had sex with people off tinder, gone to clubs and bars, gone to hockey games…. I get Covid at GRANDMAS HOUSE
Randomize
